Family Spotlight:
Kathy and Whitney
Kathy McGuire and Whitney Conneally live in Baltimore, Maryland. They have been in each other's lives for 26 years, and have been romantically involved for more than eight years. They are pictured here with their son, Justin, and they also have a daughter on the way.
Anxious to personally affirm their commitment to one another, Kathy and Whitney registered a civil union in Vermont in 2001. Unfortunately, the benefits conferred upon couples in a civil union end at the Vermont state line, which means the union is legally meaningless in Maryland.
"There are a host of difficulties we've had as a 'nontraditional family," Kathy said, "but we don't want to raise Justin with a victim mentality, so we try not to focus on the list of injustices done to us. If my son points them out, we let him know that everyone is at a disadvantage one way or another."
Because Maryland does not recognize families headed by same-sex couples, Kathy, a CPA, pays an estimated $1,200 a year in additional taxes to have Whitney, a chef, as a dependent on her health insurance. Kathy and Whitney have purchased a house and two cars together, and they make the payments together. However, should Kathy or Whitney die, the other would have to pay inheritance tax on ½ the value of their own property. "We took the time to get a lawyer and incurred the costs associated with living trusts and wills, just so we could protect each other as much as possible," said Kathy. "However, we can't get around the Maryland inheritance tax, because Maryland doesn't consider us a family.
"Whitney is not eligible to take unpaid leave under the Family and Medical Leave Act when our daughter is born," said Kathy. "She has to wait until the adoption is final, which can't happen until some time after the birth. Furthermore, even though Whitney has raised Justin with me since he was 8 months old, hostile members of her family may be able to take his inheritance from him if she died. Nor would would Justin inherit Whitney's social security benefits.
"I promised Justin that one day we will have a big ceremony in Maryland with the whole family present, and that he can be in it and carry the rings," Kathy said. "We could have a ceremony at any time, but we'd like to wait until civil marriage is legal here, so we'll know that we also have the rights and benefits necessary for us to properly care for each other and our children."
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